Rain. What is it about rain that feels so liberating?
There´s something about running in it that makes it feel as if your troubles have been washed clean right off of you. Perhaps, for me, it´s a reminder of burden free days when I was a mere child. That is when I developed a love for the rain afterall. The sound of thunder and the sight of lightning tearing the skies apart was always so appealing.
Many times, I found myself walking alone, soaked to the bone. Thoughts running rampant in my mind. But always the constant beat of the rain showers calmed me. Even now, as I sit here smoking yet another cigerette, watching the waves of rain. An inner calmness has found it´s way into me. For this brief moment, I am sane. For this brief moment I am me. Suddenly, my thoughts make more sense. I realize that as bad as things are right now, it doesn´t help to sulk. Sure, it can be depressing, infuriating even. BUT SHIT HAPPENS. Then life goes on. It always does, with you or without you. Might aswell enjoy the ride.
Friday, August 26, 2011
Broken Pieces
Struggling,
Through the filth my life has become.
Tired, Oh so tired.
Desperate for a breath of fresh air,
A tiny hint of who I was before,
A reason to smile...
A reason to go on.
Broken pieces,
That is all that remains.
Broken pieces, and nothing more.
Chasing a memory,
Vague like smoke.
An endless pursuit of what once was mine.
If only I could catch it.
Snatch it! Right out of the air,
Then, and only then,
I know I could shed this rotting flesh,
Emerging as what I was really meant to be.
As who I long to be.
But instead,
I watch.
As my hopes and dreams are broken.
Plummeting to the floor,
Like dying butterflies.
Desperately, foolishly fluttering,
On the ground.
Until they´re smashed,
Beneath someone´s foot.
The color in their wings,
Trickling away,
Like blood from an open wound.
Life has carved it´s lessons,
Into my skin.
Scarring me.
Leaving traces.
So that I shall not soon forget,
Happiness comes with a price.
Or so I´ve been taught.
So, why fight against the current?
Let it´s icy dagger pierce my soul,
Once again.
Let it swallow me.
Imprison me.
In my lonely cell.
In my solitude,
To which I am so accustomed to by now.
Let me be lost.
The echo of a ghost.
For I am the only one who insists,
On fixing what is broken...
Broken pieces.
That is all that remains.
Broken pieces, and nothing more.
Through the filth my life has become.
Tired, Oh so tired.
Desperate for a breath of fresh air,
A tiny hint of who I was before,
A reason to smile...
A reason to go on.
Broken pieces,
That is all that remains.
Broken pieces, and nothing more.
Chasing a memory,
Vague like smoke.
An endless pursuit of what once was mine.
If only I could catch it.
Snatch it! Right out of the air,
Then, and only then,
I know I could shed this rotting flesh,
Emerging as what I was really meant to be.
As who I long to be.
But instead,
I watch.
As my hopes and dreams are broken.
Plummeting to the floor,
Like dying butterflies.
Desperately, foolishly fluttering,
On the ground.
Until they´re smashed,
Beneath someone´s foot.
The color in their wings,
Trickling away,
Like blood from an open wound.
Life has carved it´s lessons,
Into my skin.
Scarring me.
Leaving traces.
So that I shall not soon forget,
Happiness comes with a price.
Or so I´ve been taught.
So, why fight against the current?
Let it´s icy dagger pierce my soul,
Once again.
Let it swallow me.
Imprison me.
In my lonely cell.
In my solitude,
To which I am so accustomed to by now.
Let me be lost.
The echo of a ghost.
For I am the only one who insists,
On fixing what is broken...
Broken pieces.
That is all that remains.
Broken pieces, and nothing more.
Warped And Twisted
Harsh words and violent blows
Hidden secrets nobody knows
Eyes are open, hands are fisted
Deep inside I'm warped and twisted
So many tricks and so many lies
Too many whens and too many whys
Nobody's special, nobody's gifted
I'm just me, warped and twisted
Sleeping awake, choking on a dream
Listening loudly to a silent scream
Call my mind, the number's not listed
Lost in someone so warped and twisted
On my knees, alive but dead
Look at the agony that I've bled
I'm not gone, my mind has drifted
Don't expect much, I'm warped and twisted
Burnt out, wasted, empty, and hollow
Today's just yesterday's tomorrow
The sun died out, the ashes sifted
and all that I am is warped and twisted
Hidden secrets nobody knows
Eyes are open, hands are fisted
Deep inside I'm warped and twisted
So many tricks and so many lies
Too many whens and too many whys
Nobody's special, nobody's gifted
I'm just me, warped and twisted
Sleeping awake, choking on a dream
Listening loudly to a silent scream
Call my mind, the number's not listed
Lost in someone so warped and twisted
On my knees, alive but dead
Look at the agony that I've bled
I'm not gone, my mind has drifted
Don't expect much, I'm warped and twisted
Burnt out, wasted, empty, and hollow
Today's just yesterday's tomorrow
The sun died out, the ashes sifted
and all that I am is warped and twisted
Dear God
Everytime I come up to breath I sink deeper then before,
And just when my heart is healed, life will shatter me once more,
Havn't I had it bad enough? Must you kick me while im down?
Must you insist on doing nothing as you watch me drown?
My life has been an endless struggle, one I've lost the will to fight,
I'm so tempted to close my eyes and drift away into endless night,
Why can't I ever have happiness? Why must all my days be grey?
What sin have I commited? Why must MY soul decay?
My wings lay torn and broken, why can't I just be free?
Why must I suffer tell me! For no reason can I see!
Why do others have it so easy? Why must I endure?
What makes them so different? Was I not just as pure?
I have reached the end, where everything looks black,
I have lost my way, and I fear there is no coming back.
And just when my heart is healed, life will shatter me once more,
Havn't I had it bad enough? Must you kick me while im down?
Must you insist on doing nothing as you watch me drown?
My life has been an endless struggle, one I've lost the will to fight,
I'm so tempted to close my eyes and drift away into endless night,
Why can't I ever have happiness? Why must all my days be grey?
What sin have I commited? Why must MY soul decay?
My wings lay torn and broken, why can't I just be free?
Why must I suffer tell me! For no reason can I see!
Why do others have it so easy? Why must I endure?
What makes them so different? Was I not just as pure?
I have reached the end, where everything looks black,
I have lost my way, and I fear there is no coming back.
Love
Love is a confusing thing it clouds the mind and ensnares the heart,
From the begining it takes over it slowly tears you apart,
Seducing your better judgement in its subtle yet lethal way,
Killing you slowly as it poisons your soul day by day,
It leeches itself upon you until its all that you know,
And once it grabs ahold of you its next to impossible to let go.
And as addictive as it is, like an intoxicating drug so sweet,
Like a smiling stranger you just cant help but greet,
That you never suspect it can do what it can do,
Yes you've heard the stories but that cant happen to you,
So you give yourself over and accept it with open arms,
You've been bought, seduced, by its tricks and its charms.
And just when you think you have it all everything falls apart,
And you realize nothing hurts as much as a wounded heart.
So you're left alone to wallow in your shame,
and with a broken heart you realize,
Nothing....
Will ever again be the same.
From the begining it takes over it slowly tears you apart,
Seducing your better judgement in its subtle yet lethal way,
Killing you slowly as it poisons your soul day by day,
It leeches itself upon you until its all that you know,
And once it grabs ahold of you its next to impossible to let go.
And as addictive as it is, like an intoxicating drug so sweet,
Like a smiling stranger you just cant help but greet,
That you never suspect it can do what it can do,
Yes you've heard the stories but that cant happen to you,
So you give yourself over and accept it with open arms,
You've been bought, seduced, by its tricks and its charms.
And just when you think you have it all everything falls apart,
And you realize nothing hurts as much as a wounded heart.
So you're left alone to wallow in your shame,
and with a broken heart you realize,
Nothing....
Will ever again be the same.
Sitting In The Rain
Sitting in the rain, thinking of you,
Chilled to the bone frozen all through.
The rain keeps pouring, my heart keeps breaking,
The world gives grief, and I keep taking.
Cant tell the difference between my tears and the rain.
Soaked with the showers and soaked in my pain.
The skies grow darker, the wind grows colder,
And this meloncholy tune grows older.
Lightning flashes and the clouds rumble,
As deeper into this depression I tumble.
For I don't have you, my lover, my friend.
Without you it seems this rain will never end.
Behind the clouds the sun will hide,
Everyday that you're not by my side.
All that is left is the bitter cold,
And lonliness as each day unfolds.
It hasn't stopped raining since that distant day,
When we kissed goodbye and each went our own way.
I'm so lost without your love I don't know what to do,
Other than sit in the rain.... And think of you.
Chilled to the bone frozen all through.
The rain keeps pouring, my heart keeps breaking,
The world gives grief, and I keep taking.
Cant tell the difference between my tears and the rain.
Soaked with the showers and soaked in my pain.
The skies grow darker, the wind grows colder,
And this meloncholy tune grows older.
Lightning flashes and the clouds rumble,
As deeper into this depression I tumble.
For I don't have you, my lover, my friend.
Without you it seems this rain will never end.
Behind the clouds the sun will hide,
Everyday that you're not by my side.
All that is left is the bitter cold,
And lonliness as each day unfolds.
It hasn't stopped raining since that distant day,
When we kissed goodbye and each went our own way.
I'm so lost without your love I don't know what to do,
Other than sit in the rain.... And think of you.
When Is The Right Time To Say I Love You?
When is the right time to say I love you?
When I have you in my arms?
When I'm seduced by all your charms?
When I kiss your soft full lips?
When I hold you from the hips?
When is the right time to say I love you?
When we're gazing into eachothers eyes?
When we hear each other's sighs?
When we hold each other's hands?
When no words are uttered, yet we understand?
When is the right time to say I love you?
When we lay together in bed?
When you're all that's in my head?
When we make love all night long?
When we know nothing can go wrong?
When is the right time to say I love you?
Now, Later, Tommorrow, Past!
My love for you will always last!!!
You are special in all you do!
And now is the right time to say...
I LOVE YOU!!!
When I have you in my arms?
When I'm seduced by all your charms?
When I kiss your soft full lips?
When I hold you from the hips?
When is the right time to say I love you?
When we're gazing into eachothers eyes?
When we hear each other's sighs?
When we hold each other's hands?
When no words are uttered, yet we understand?
When is the right time to say I love you?
When we lay together in bed?
When you're all that's in my head?
When we make love all night long?
When we know nothing can go wrong?
When is the right time to say I love you?
Now, Later, Tommorrow, Past!
My love for you will always last!!!
You are special in all you do!
And now is the right time to say...
I LOVE YOU!!!
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