Pulled Over In Cananea

Red and blue lights flashed violently in the rearview mirror as we were escorted off the road by the officer that Helio had decided to cut off just now.  We were in Cananea, Sonara which was another of those tiny Mexican towns littered in convivially colored homes all built on mountain sides. Complete with random shops selling everything from tires to vegetables springing up on the side of the road all along the way.  It lays about an hour south from Bisbee, Arizona and is known for its copper mine which happens to be the largest in the Americas.  But that really doesn’t matter since it’s not as if we stopped to purchase copper.  It was after all just another pit stop on our drive through Mexico.  What mattered at the moment was finding our way out of this town and out of this predicament. The road had become a mess of turn arounds and what not and we couldn’t, for the love of god, find the way out. Which is what lead to Helio drastically turning into the wrong lane and into the path of a local police officer. Once we pulled over into one of the intersecting roads, a lonely deserted dead end path, the officer began his instructions over a loudspeaker.

“Turn off the vehicle and place your hands on the steering wheel.”

Three officers exited the truck, a blue Ford F150 with the word “Policia” in bold white letters, and made their way over to our vehicle, standing next to the driver side window. The leader of the group, a dark skinned man with a salt and pepper mustache, and looking like he had squeezed into his uniform this morning, leaned over and after peeling off his shades from his face looked Helio straight in the eyes. He placed a hand on his revolver that hung from his belt, obviously trying to pull off the intimidation card.

“Hand me your driver’s license” he grunted.

Helio did as he was told while I tried to look as suspicious less as humanly possible.  It was in my best interest not to get any unwanted attention and by the looks of these guys, they were not playing around. They stared us down while adjusting their uniforms and only turning around to spit on the floor every now and then.

“What are you guys doing so far away from Chihuahua?” he asked noticing the license plates on our vehicle.

Helio went on to explain we were just driving through on our way to visit his family and lost our way. The officer, without a reply, handed the license over to one of his companions and asked him to run it through the system. Wiping away the sweat from his forehead, he opened the driver side door and ordered Helio to step out of the vehicle and proceeded to empty out the contents of Helio’s pockets onto the hood of the car, tossing them like common trash.

“You get off too” he ordered staring in my direction.

I stepped out onto the street, my eyes squinting due to the sun blasting on my face, and perhaps out of habit, placed my hands on the hood and spread my legs apart, ready to be searched. The third officer, a skeleton of a man with a shiny bald head, came over to me and also started taking out my belongings from my pockets, flinging them onto the hood just like his friend. First my cell phone, then my cigarettes, and finally my wallet.

“Great, these assholes are going to take my money” I thought as I recalled that I was carrying over a thousand dollars in my wallet for the trip.

“You got any identification on you” the officer barked into my ear while he patted me down. I grabbed my wallet from the hood of the car and handed him my Texas driver’s license and then went back into the position I was in before.

“Well, what do we have here? Un Gabacho” he laughed as he realized I was from the states. “What brings you into Mexico Americano?”

“Driving through, sir” I answered mirroring Helio’s response.

The first officer who appeared to have finished searching through Helio’s pockets walked over to him and began to look over my driver’s license as if he knew how to read English, “You´re telling me you got family in Mexico too?”

“No sir, I can’t say that I do. I just came along for the drive.”

“Well, that’s too bad because given that your friend here almost caused an accident, we’re going to have to take him in. I’m sure you’re aware however, that you can’t drive a Mexican Vehicle with your “American” license right?”

But before I could respond, the officer who had been running Helio’s license through the system had placed Helio’s hands behind his back and was rigidly escorting him towards the truck. I couldn’t make out what Helio was saying but I’m more than sure it was something along the lines of asking why they were arresting him. I couldn’t believe it, he was being arrested over an accident that never came to be. Was it actually necessary for him to be taken in? Couldn’t they just let us go with a warning like they do so often in the states?

“What’s going to happen now” I inquired.

“We’re taking him down to the station and fining him” he stated with one finger digging into his ear.  “Once we’ve gotten all his information into our system and he pays off his fine, he’ll be free to go in a couple of hours” he continued as he wiped whatever he found in his ear onto his pants.

My mind reeled off thinking of ways to get out of this situation. Then, recalling that we were in Mexico, I blurted out the first thing that came to mind, “That sounds like a lot of unnecessary work on your part, sir. Perhaps we could find a way to settle the matter here?”

“What did you have in mind, Americano?”

I crossed my fingers and hoped that the law enforcement here was just as greedy as the pigs back in Juarez. “Well, you say he’s going to have to pay a fine, right? I was thinking maybe we could just give you the money here, and that way you wouldn’t have to go all the way back to the station.”

The officer stood in silence as I could tell he was contemplating my proposal, deciding whether or not to accept my bribe. He must have been thinking harder than what he was accustomed to because his eyes were ping-ponging back and forth in their dark eye sockets. I looked towards the truck and noticed that Helio was already sitting in the bed with an oppressed expression on his face. “I know that we could have caused a terrible accident, sir. But if you’d just give us a chance, we’ll pay the fine and be out of your city soon enough” I stated trying to push my offer onto him even more.

“The fine is going to add up to 500 pesos” he muttered at me snapping out of his daze.

“No problem officer. I can pay the fine here with you and we’ll be more careful in the future.”

“You guys seem like good kids… and the station is out of our way. I guess we can help you out this once, but make sure to head straight out of town after this. I don’t want to have to change my mind.”

I didn’t think twice as a jumped for my wallet and handed him the 500 pesos, which is roughly around forty dollars. I thanked him for his kindness as he put up the bills towards the sky, using the sun to check that they weren’t counterfeit. Once he was satisfied I didn’t hand him Monopoly money, he whistled to grab his companion’s attention and signed for him to let Helio go. The bed was pulled open, letting out a metallic groan, and Helio hopped off of the truck in one swift movement. The officers indicated we could pick up our belongings from the hood of the car and be on our way but not before taking a few cigarettes out of my pack. We collected everything off of the hood, double checking to make sure they hadn’t pocketed anything other than those cigarettes during our encounter and jumped back into our seats. They stood by the truck and watched us like hawks as we did all of this. As we drove back onto the main road I noticed that the officers were splitting the money amongst themselves. Thank God for greedy bastards.